Weddings, I believe, makes a family.
From the day a family member announces his or her intentions to marry, the family is kept in constant motion and commotion. And the drama begins.
Oh, why so early?
We don’t have enough money for the wedding!
My, my, are you pregnant?
Why of all people that girl?
You are marrying a family of drunks, for God’s sake!
The couple’s arduous plans combined with the lethal family sentiments make marriages colorful sights to behold.
Also, getting married nowadays is like suicide. In a small town like ours, getting married is also feeding the whole town, whether you sent your invitations or not. Sometimes, it would be wise to get married before a judge and invite only some close relatives and friends. That was how my sister and my cousin did. I think they only lose a few thousands with their weddings.
Since church weddings are considered a tradition, the Filipinos, being traditional, expect a big celebration.
In the end, whether we like it or not, a couple in love will have their way, be it a necessity to marry or otherwise.
My first cousin got married a few days ago and it was time for us to form a circle of support despite the odds. The odds being the manner to make it happen. Of course it takes a lot of money to do such. I assume the couple has to borrow money and ask some relatives to contribute knowing their savings is not enough. Never enough.
Aside from the financial burden, marrying produces a lot of emotions that sometimes are traumatic. I am sure if given the choice, couples would back out before the real thing. Parents, siblings, relatives and friends would create unnecessary problems in the course of the planning.
There is the sister who got angry why her children were not part of the entourage. There is this relative who got insulted he was not given an invitation. The mother got angry and emotional out of nonsense. My cousin even has to negotiate with a crying cousin because someone from the girl’s side asked her to leave the table during the banquet. That is only on our side. Imagine the girl’s.
In weddings, there is always an aggrieved party despite how well-planned they are.
In all these dramas, the couple has to deal with the situation without any support from anyone because everyone is lost in our own passions.
I am sure no one wanted to be part of a couple’s problem. We only wanted our friendship and sense of proprietorship with them to last. A kind of selfish attitude we wanted to hold knowing soon the husband or wife now owns each other and soon we will be spectators in the side. Like abandoned parents.
So we create disturbances, drama, to be noticed.
But because blood is thicker than water, we overcome all these obstacles and celebrate the marriage in banquets, drinking the whole night through, all the problems left behind. Comforting hugs, glasses of wines, sane minds all have quieted the turbulence, leaving everyone exhausted and with a bad hangover a day after.
The drama will repeat in baptisms or when another wedding will come about in the course of a lifetime.
It is a cycle.
Cartoon grabbed from darrenbyrne.com