06 December 2007
Warning: This Is Full of Shit
The following bulletin is being issued as a warning due to its explosive nature (especially those residing overseas):
The Glorietta blast is being blamed by our police on methane gas from shit under the old Makati supermarket building. Ever since the police made their report known, the world is both laughing and fearing Filipinos, as the people with the most explosive shit in the world. Scientists from Russia, the US and China are now analyzing the typical Filipino diet to learn what could produce shit with such an explosive force.
The Harvard Medical School have come out with a preliminary conclusion that it is the strange mixture of bagoong, dinuguan and balot combined that give Filipinos' shit their explosive nature. Steps are also being discussed among airport managers worldwide to ask Filipinos to empty their colons before boarding planes lest they bring explosive material on board.
In news elsewhere, several Filipinos were kidnapped in Afghanistan and Iraq, supposedly by Arab terrorists. The kidnapped Filipinos are being asked to produce shit to be made into bombs for suicide missions. The US State Department fearing deadly consequences from these shit-IED's have assigned Delta Force operatives to keep watch over all Filipinos abroad to prevent any more Filipinos (and their shit) from falling into the hands of terror groups.
(Only Filipinos can make this! This came from my mail today and I refused to keep this shit so I'm sharing it with you.)