I feel suddenly alone and empty. The rain added the drama. A perfect setting.
My thoughts wander. What if I go out? What if I get myself wet?
But then again the rain , this rain, would have me in her arms like a mother would. Hugging. Filling this emptiness. Dousing this longing.
And so I drag myself out.
Oh this rain. This life. It feels cold yet it satisfies my want. It drenches me but it also cleanses my tired soul. Ah rain. I miss my childhood when I can dance naked under your caress. No inhibitions. No people to please. No nothing. I miss the pageant unfolding. The no nonsense drama. The real me. I miss my innocence. I miss my life. I miss you.
And these are the thoughts of a forty year old. In the rain.
When my Indon friend would have been here he would have asked- Sedang apa? (What are you doing?) I would have replied- Kabarku baik-baik saja. (I am doing good.)