Search and You Shall Find in My World

17 October 2009

You've got a friend

Tears are God’s gift to us. Our holy water. They heal us as they flow. -Rita Schiano

I was reading this book by Gore Vidal talking about the other side of life we all hate- loneliness, sadness, the need for people to belong, conformities dictated by society and which we follow for fear of being left behind.

And like a bad omen coming true, a friend of mine called me up. He was crying. Those crying moments and the feeling that we are so alone with no friends to share our emotions much less a shoulder to cry on? They were terrible moments I don't want to happen again. So I asked him what happened. He said he just wanted someone to listen to him. Listen I did.

Honestly I have done a lot of crying in my 41 years of living. A million times infact! Maybe I was born twinned with all the sadness in the world. If all of my tears were saved, they could become my own private beach. Crying out of frustration. Crying over loved ones who made their departures. Crying over sentimental journeys. I always cry.

Some say that crying is a show of weakness. I don't believe that and have proven that the people who said that were wrong. Crying makes a person stronger and better equipped with the real world. Crying is like cleansing yourself, making you ready for another challenge.

So I asked my friend to go on crying and I would listen even if there were sobs I only hear on the other end. And while he was crying, he told me a story of a man who got sick and his realizations that we only blame God for everything that is negative- when we are sick, when we suffer, when we have problems. But we never blame God when we are happy and enjoying the good life.

I think my friend is finding his way to the realities of life. And it is good. Because in the end, we are the only responsible person capable of doing what is best for us. Our counselors, elders, psychiatrists, mentors, those who guide us- will never make a blueprint of our lives for us to follow. We are the decision-makers. And I am glad he came to that point.

So Brother, whenever you need a friend, call me. I will always be there.

I am sharing here with you part of the lyrics from the song Baby Don't Cry by INXS-
When you're down and confused
Nothing seems right
And it's you who decides
Who's going to make it right

Well life ain't no joke
But it's good when you smile
Steal everything
But you won't get far

Sometimes you will fall
What cha gonna do?
Give your friend a call

We know that you can smile
Even though it takes a while
To lose your fears and say
Gonna lose your fears and say

Do you know who you are
And where you're going to
Don't you know that love
Gonna pull you
Gonna pull you through now baby

Baby don't cry...

(Picture from Lyrics copied from

No comments: